Small Steps Create Big Shifts

A few years ago, my confidence was totally shattered. To the point where there was no evidence that it had ever existed at all. I retreated from pretty much everything outside of our family and going to church on Sundays. It was a breaking I never imagined I would recover from. And yet, it was a breaking I can now look back on and see I desperately needed.

My foundation had cracked. At first I didn’t notice the fracture. Over time, it grew as it deepened. Until one day, I woke up and realized something was majorly off in my life and I needed to make some pretty drastic decisions to come back into wholeness and health with Jesus. I won’t get into the nitty gritty of all that led up to that “a-ha!” moment in my walk with the Lord, because I want to focus on something else. I want to focus on the power of small beginnings when partnered with consistent and intentional small steps forward.

In a season where I didn’t know my value - or if I even held any at all - I started going to the Lord. I’d spend about 10-15 minutes reading the Bible, and each day I started my prayer time with the Lord with a simple question: “Lord, what do You want me to know?” I would journal whatever He impressed upon my heart. Sometimes, we would spend a few short minutes, and other times I would get completely lost in what He was saying to me. The point isn’t the length of time we spent together - the point is that this small step of asking the Lord a question and writing down His response started to heal my heart.

As He answered my question of “Lord, what do You want me to know?”, something inside of me started to shift. I found myself no longer being easily defined by others’ opinions of me - good or bad! They were just…well, opinions! Kind of like coffee is best black, or coffee is best with mostly milk. Neither is wrong or right or really holds any eternal significance. And so began my understanding of others’ opinions of me…they were just information that I got to take to Jesus to see what He thought about it.

That was a next small step that created a big shift within my heart. Taking the words and opinions others had spoken over me to Him. I’ve become what one of my mentors has coined as “a holy tattle-tale.” I process best through writing, so when something comes to my mind that leaves me feeling less than amazing, I’ll whip out my journal and write “Lord, did You hear what so-and-so said to me today? What do You want me to know about that?” You better believe He will reveal SO MUCH through this exchange. It’s my way of coming boldly before Him (kind of like when my kids fling open my door when I’m working because they just have to get something off their chest or they’ll burst!). Oftentimes, Jesus will reveal to me WHY what someone said was painful for my heart, where I was misplacing where my value comes from…and usually, He will lead me to forgive and move on.

Forgiveness is one of my favorite spiritual disciplines, weapons, liberations, freedoms, and way of living a gospel-centric lifestyle. The Lord has done many big shifts in me through moments of forgiving others, surrendering the pain caused by others to Him, and then receiving from Him. I feel like forgiveness is a topic for another day, but I’d love to challenge you with this thought: If forgiveness and letting go is difficult with you, it is quite possible you haven’t experienced the love of God for you in a relational way. And there’s nothing wrong with you if that’s the case - it just means there’s an opportunity for you to get to know Him in a deeper way.

All of that to say…small steps, when done with consistent intentionality in partnership with Jesus can lead to incredibly big shifts in our hearts, our mindsets, our relationships, and our general overall well being. Having Him as our Shepherd is truly the greatest gift there is. Today, I’m a different person than I was a few years ago. I know who I am, but more importantly, I know Whose I am. I am still growing in confidence…and I pray I spend the rest of my life doing so…not settling for the lie that I’ve arrived and have it all figured out. I pray this encourages you in your journey towards fuller freedom and deeper healing.

Many blessings to you,

Hannah